a bit about my past

I think I’ve always been a procrastinator.  As far back as I can remember, I was doing things at the last minute – often to the point of panic.

But in the last few years it’s gotten worse.   Maybe it’s because I’ve made a habit of it, and the habit just gets stronger.  Maybe it’s because I can usually get away with it?  Maybe it’s because I’m not really that into what I’m doing.  Maybe it’s because of a million and one reasons that I haven’t thought of yet.

Regardless, it’s a problem.

And it’s a problem that I’ve tried to fix.  I have resolved to myself time and time again that I will be better.  And then I’m never better.  Cue repeat.

I procrastinated in high school.  I procrastinated in my undergrad degree.  I procrastinated in my master’s degree.  The worst was my master’s degree: with repeated extensions and late penalties.  Still, I didn’t really finish everything: there are still two projects outstanding, leaving me in a weird limbo where I don’t feel I can move on until the projects are complete.

need to fix myself.  Because I can’t continue like this.